So where did this wine come from, and how has it survived for so long? The part of the story that we know for sure starts in Speyer, Germany, in the year 1867. While excavating a Roman tomb dating back to 325–350 C.E., archaeologists discovered two sarcophagi containing the remains of a man and a woman respectively, and an assortment of glass bottles that were likely meant to accompany the couple on their journey to the afterlife.

Though most of the bottles had been cracked or emptied, one remained unbroken and filled with liquid. And it proved that when it came to traveling to the halls of Elysium, the Romans weren't averse to taking some road brews. An analysis of the outside of the Speyer bottle showed that its contents were alcoholic, if not particularly appetizing. Because although there was a fair amount of liquid still contained inside, about two-thirds had congealed into a hard, resinous substance thanks to the Roman preservation method of sealing off the wine with a layer of olive oil. A blend of herbs likely finished off the process for additional flavor. All in all, it's probably not the most appealing beverage at this point — especially since it's no longer alcoholic.

Yes, sadly, the Speyer bottle will no longer get you drunk, though perhaps the spirit of that, er, spirit provided some comfort to the tomb's occupants. If you can convince the caretakers of the Pfalz History Museum, which has been home to the bottle for more than a century, you technically could drink it, though. According to wine professor Monika Christmann, "Micro-biologically it is probably not spoiled, but [as you can tell based on its appearance] it would not bring joy to the palate."

You'd have a hard time getting inside the bottle, though. Although some scientists have petitioned to be able to open the bottle and analyze the contents chemically, Ludger Tekampe, the department head in charge of storing the bottle, is adamant. "We are not sure whether or not it could stand the shock to the air. It is still liquid, and there are some who believe it should be subjected to new scientific analysis, but we are not sure." But the bottle is a treasure in and of itself — we don't really feel the need to get inside it any more than we felt the need to get into the half-drunk Coors scattered around our college dorm on a Saturday morning.